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“Coffee, sir?” “No, thanks.”

8/23/2006

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Posted by Jon
Here I am, sitting in a meeting room waiting to run a pre-proposal planning workshop later this morning, having arrived ludicrously early after an amazingly traffic-free drive. We’re in a brand new hotel that’s obviously given real thought to their design and branding. Every participant has a lovely folder in front of them with a free mousemat; the hotel has kindly provided a fact sheet about its services.​
​Apparently, while I am waiting, I can go and enjoy “a selection of notorious Costa Coffee’s”, which – never minding the guest appearance of an itinerant apostrophe – is a rather worrying concept. I’m picturing the barista’s framed gallery of newspaper front covers – ‘Coffee poisoning: five rushed to emergency ward’ or ‘Coffee shop tragedy: “It tasted fine at the time,” comments victim.’

The leaflet proceeds to tell me that each drinks is “made from freshly ground Costa granules and perfectly made as only it should be.” Many a proposal writer would be proud of creating such a glowing description of instant coffee were they selling it in a tender.

As for the local attractions: “for the thrill seekers there’s Drayton Park Manor & Zoo”. I’m not sure I want to know….
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    BJ Lownie and Jon Williams are the co-founders of Strategic Proposals.

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