Posted by Jon on 29 September, 2008 under Musings | 
It’s always great when we can persuade a senior executive to drop into one of our courses to add their weight to the discussions. Hearing a Chief Executive or Senior VP discussing the importance of proposals – and offering their personal support for improvement initiatives – does wonders for the confidence of the attendees.Only, it doesn’t always quite work, no matter how carefully the exec’s been briefed. Take the following ‘praise’ offered to a group of proposal managers at a recent event:
“You guys do a fantastic job – I come up late at night and there you are”
Noooooo! That’s precisely what proposal centres should be trying to avoid!
When the security guard on the night shift drops by your desk to say goodnight before heading home – when success is measured in terms of hours worked, commitment viewed as a willingness to persevere with too few resources and an unnecessarily inefficient process – then it’s time for change.
Posted by BJ on 25 September, 2008 under Musings |
I recently reviewed a list of countries from which readers have accessed our blog and found it quite interesting. Thinking you might enjoy knowing who else is visiting us, here are the countries from which we’ve had visitors.
As you’d probably expect, we’ve had readers from the US and Canada.
From Jon’s side of the pond we’ve had readers from France, Germany, Italy, the Netherlands and Sweden (presented in alphabetical order :-)
We’ve also had readers from Kuwait, Jordan, India and Nepal.
And from the other side of the world, we’ve had visitors from Australia, Singapore and Indonesia.
We’ve also had a dozen or so visitors whose country is not known to us (something to do with how they access the net I suspect).
Given that when I started out in proposals neither the worldwide web (aka – The Net) nor the APMP existed and most of us were “out there and alone”, it is most cool that the technology and the profession of proposals have come so far as to allow us to connect in this way.
*Yes, as many of you will have realized, this is a case of using the word “wherefore” incorrectly. As you know, the word “wherefore” is defined as “for what reason” or “why”. And it is often misused. Did you catch it? If not, perhaps you need to brush up on your Shakespeare.
Posted by Jon on 23 September, 2008 under Musings |
You know how we talk about the need for a good title for your proposal – something (other than “Response to RFP”) that catches the reader’s attention, and provides a snapshot of the story you’re going to tell?
I guess the following newspaper headline, which I spied whilst wandering around Brighton recently, demonstrates the point. It’s arresting, and just makes you want to know more:
So, when you write your next proposal, remember: what’s your rat?
Posted by BJ on 19 September, 2008 under Musings |
On the same trip to New York City that I mention in my last post, I went up to the Observatory deck of the Empire State Building. I’m originally from NY and have played host to many people visiting the city and this was somewhere around trip number 20 or so for me. However, I still find the experience of being that high above the city and the incredible view to be nothing short of amazing. And when the time period during which the construction was undertaken (it was during the Depression) and how quickly it was put up (would you believe 13 months?), it is that much more incredible and fascinating to me.
The whole experience was apparently lost on several of the younger people, ranging in age from about 13 to 18, who had made the trip up the 100 plus stories. They weren’t looking out over the city and enjoying the view or wandering around the deck reading the many posters telling the tale of how the building was constructed. Nope. Not interested. I’m sure many of you will have guessed already what they were doing.
That’s right, they were playing on their various game players, texting or talking on the phone and listening to music players…many of them doing all three simultaneously.
What’s this have to do with proposals? Bear in mind that in 10-15 years time, these same individuals will be the reviewers and evaluators of proposals. So what will proposals need to look like to capture their attention? Because if they are uninterested in or bored by being at the top of Empire State Building, you can bet that plain text documents with a few scattered graphics sure isn’t going to do it for them.
Posted by Jon on 17 September, 2008 under Word play & writing |
The oil company’s adverts that I spied the other day on the gates at Brussels airport read:
more energy. fewer emissions.
with technology, we can do both.
Yep, and with a decent proofreader you could even capitalise letters correctly, too.
Am I the only person pedantic enough to find this sort of thing incredibly irritating – and entirely counter-productive? I’m supposed to be impressed by their modern, innovative outlook – but end up thinking they’re pretentious fools. Or is it just that I’m not trendy enough to be in their target audience?
Posted by BJ on 15 September, 2008 under Word play & writing |
I was on a tour bus in New York City recently while hosting my wife’s 13-year old niece, Ilayda, who’s visiting from Turkey for the summer.
The people on the bus, as one would expect on a tour bus in New York City, were from other countries and didn’t speak English as their first language, if they spoke it at all. Ilayda, for instance, is just learning English, has a vocabulary of a couple of hundred words and can make herself understood, but is only just learning the language.
I was therefore somewhat surprised by the wording the tour guide used when he explained the need for people to be quiet. He could have simply said, “Please be quiet.” Or he could have stated this very simply with, “No noise please.” Probably the most effective way to convey what he wanted would have been to put a finger to his lips and said, “Shhhhhh.”
Instead, the tour guide said,
“If you must converse while we’re meandering through the city, please keep your conversations as brief as possible and to a minimal roar.”
Now I ask you, even for those who have a basic understand of English, what do you suppose the chances are that they’d be able to understand this person’s request?
No doubt you’ll already be making the connection to proposal content. The job of a proposal is not to impress the reviewers/evaluators with our fancy vocabulary and language abilities. It’s to state the information in a clearly and in a way that is easy to understand. As you’ve heard us say many, many times, “Keep it simple.”
Posted by Jon on 11 September, 2008 under Word play & writing |
Overheard in an office recently… a desperate account manager wandering from desk to desk, looking for someone who could help with content for a proposal due the following day:
“I need someone who can make it up, with just a hint of ‘techie’”
I was rather encouraged that, even in his moment of crisis, he was still sharp enough to want content that was written in a style that would appeal to the relevant evaluators.
